Understanding Emotional Labor & The Mental Load: The Weight Women Carry with Kara Cruz, LMFT
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Episode Summary: In this affirming and insightful episode, host Shaina Siber sits down with Kara Cruz, LMFT — a therapist, clinical supervisor, and women's mental health educator — to unpack the often-invisible forces that contribute to burnout: emotional labor and the mental load. Together, they explore how these burdens show up across caregiving roles, relationships, and professional life, particularly for those who are cisgender, femme-presenting, or socially perceived as women.
Kara and Shaina also explore the societal conditioning that encourages self-abandonment, people-pleasing, and perfectionism in caregiving roles, and how these patterns often show up in the therapy room — both for our clients and for us as clinicians. Listeners will gain tools to better identify and validate these experiences, along with practical interventions rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS), values clarification, and boundary work.
This episode offers both validation and direction — a must-listen for therapists, caregivers, or anyone who’s ever felt overwhelmed by the invisible labor they carry.
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Topics Covered:
- The difference between emotional labor and mental load
- Gendered and cultural expectations around caregiving
- How perfectionism, people-pleasing, and self-abandonment contribute to burnout
- Working with high-functioning, high-achieving clients who carry invisible emotional burdens
- Boundary-setting as a clinical and personal skill
- Using IFS and parts work to address internalized caregiving roles
- Intersectional considerations: class, gender identity, and relationship structure
- Naming guilt and shame without pathologizing it
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About Our Guest: Kara Cruz is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, private practice owner, clinical supervisor, women’s mental health advocate, and educator. She specializes in reproductive mental health, ADHD, trauma, mood and anxiety conditions, and provides therapy for individuals and couples, alongside CE trainings for therapists. Kara co-founded the Women’s Support Circle and also leads the Wellness for Women Healers Community — a free network for professionals in women’s health and wellness.
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Connect with Kara Cruz:
- Website: karacruz.com
- Instagram: @karacruzwellness
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Conflict of Interest Disclosure: The host, Shaina Siber-Sanderowitz, LCSW, is the Founder of Affirm Mental Health, an accredited CE provider. She receives financial compensation from Affirm Mental Health for the development and delivery of continuing education content. There are no other conflicts of interest to disclose.
Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for clinical training or treatment. If you or someone you know needs mental health support, please reach out to a licensed professional.
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